What would it be...?

Alhamdulillah...my essay got submitted for the MSC Synapse Magazine! Yippee!!

What Would It Be…?

Life is short. Once upon a time you were born, and in a blink’s eye, you’re almost a quarter century old. You think that the fun is about to begin – truth is, you’re nearly approaching the deadliest days of your life.

When I was eight, I dreamt of becoming a lecturer. Daddy’s influence, I’d say, because he’d have occasional outstations that’d keep him tuck comfy in the aircrafts passenger seat, and we’d all be sending him off with envy. And of course, the hopes that daddy would bring back humps of souvenirs and goodies – well who didn’t like surprises?

Three years flew, and I turned eleven. My ambition? A stewardess. They get to work in the air (isn’t that cool?), travel abroad, like, every week, and their jobs are pretty much simple – well, it depends on how much stars they owe the airline. Haha. But I scratched that off – think I couldn’t handle being away from home that long a period.

The days of high school came, and I became love-struck with chemistry. Perhaps, why not, a biochemist? Jiggle with all the chemicals in the world. Yikes.

Apparently, high school ended, and I was all determined to become a pharmacist. Yup, a pharmacist. However, when scribbling the JPA form, dad – well, he didn’t frown, but the smile he gave wasn’t his usual smile. Said that he yearned so long to become a doctor, but hadn’t the chance, and had high hopes that his daughter would make up for his dream. Truth is, at that moment, I nearly thought I had no guts to become one.

* * *

I thought that medicine was a subject for typical geek nerds. Thought that it meant all work, no play, no fun. Thought that it meant maximum boredom. Thought that anatomy and histology would take forever to be memorized, and that biochemistry would make me go nuts. But here I am, 22 years old, being a 4^th year student, in CSMU. And, like, I’ve passed half way through my med school years.

It’d take me two more who-knows-what-will-happen years before I hit internship, and the thought of it already sends adrenaline gushes down my sympathetic trunk. Ouch. Imagine all the on-calls, the harsh rebukes, the reprimands, the urghhhh God knows what’ll happen. The days that’d be filled with books revised all night long before the next day begins, and you just can’t predict how many ‘emergency surprises’ would come rolling in per day. You’d care less on how you look, your appetite would shrink to its lowest, and one just couldn’t fuss more on what movies to catch up. Yup, a tiring, exhausting day they’d be indeed.

Come to think about it, that’s what life mingles about. You can never be too happy at all times, and so does it go for misery. What you get tomorrow, depends on how you struggle for it, today.

Four years back, being a freshie, I pinned dermatology as the field of desire if ever I thought of specializing into one. A month ago, I was thinking of neurology. And just, a week back, general practice hit my mind.

Having said that, God willing, given a decade more to live, I’d try give my best shot to become the coolest doctor ever – regardless of all the hassles one may have to face in the world. And, of course, a family of my own would seem nice too. J

-whispers^unplugged-

ps: welcome to the world, Akmal Harris!! Kak Ecah's newborn baby...and I had the chance to lay him on my lap 6 hours after the labour..the motherly feeling..indescribable!! :P

pps: am now in exam mode for 2 weeks..doakan sayer ^_^